Loneliness

There is great comfort in being with others...

The heart fills,

The mind engages,

The body responds,

The subconscious relaxes.

But wait, these are fantastic elements that if personified would never allow for loneliness.

When these elements are aware of each other a true communication that alleviates loneliness can occur.

We all have done things and have had things done to us that causes shame. This breaks the bond of these elements and has them facing the wall, standing in separate corners of the room. Loneliness is a self occupied corner. The back form a shield from anyone trying to get through.

Shame, Anger, Sorrow... any emotion has the capacity to separate these elements. It is when we face these emotions and say, "Yes, I am human and I have emotions that I don't want to experience." It is unfortunate but you can put them away for a while but they will always come back. It is like putting oil in a cardboard box. Without you touching it, it will eventually flow through the box and make a huge mess.

Most people are capable of compassion for others. Allow yourself to personify these elements and be just as compassionate for them.

As long as these elements are in communication with each other, the loneliness of being apart from others will not come so soon. It is imperative that we have outward relationships... It is also imperative that we have inward relationships.

The next time you experience loneliness that has come so immediate from a social situation, try connecting all of these elements. You may experience that bottled emotion. If you are emotionally nauseous, don't you think it is time to alleviate that feeling by doing what is necessary? Relief will come and loneliness will dissipate.

Quote of the Day

I have mentioned before that I get a quote a day (with the exception of Sunday) in my email but I don't think I have ever shared with you how to get it. First let me share with you this quote that made me feel great about my own integrity:

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared
to what lies within us.

-- Ralph Waldo Emerson

I am surrounded by people who prove themselves on what they have done and what they are going to do.  I do think it is important to have done things and to do things but what I find more important is who that person is when those things are taken away.  If no one cares what you have done and no one care what you will do, will the person that is left have enough substance to stand alone.  At one time my substance was lost.  I based it on so many outside things.  I have realized the importance of others and myself.  What lies within is what I look for in a person.  Unfortunately, we can be blind to what is truly inside another person and blind to what is truly inside ourselves.  Don't be disappointed when you see the shallow side of either.  Search for the "within" that is substance filled.  

The way that you subscribe to the quote of the day is below:

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McKinney Falls

McKinney Falls has turned out to be an excellent refuge. I absolutely love walking out there. It is similar to the walks I had in Mississippi but the landscape is a bit different. I know that I am in Texas because of the short gnarled trees, the rocky terrain and the cactus. This is just something we saw in books or magazines when I lived in Mississippi. There are several things about the Mississippi terrain that I long for but if I were to ever go back to Mississippi, I know that I would long for the Texas terrain as well. This first beautiful scene was taken at McKinney Falls and the photo does not do justice to the actual scene. It is where one of the falls feeds into a basin that continues downstream. The second scene is just as hard on the judgement of beauty. There is a bench with a table that is right beside this opening into the brooklet that runs through this area. This place has everything. I kept wondering why this park was so well kept and had so much to offer and realized after driving around the park that the Texas Parks and Recreations main building is situated on this property. If you really want to go to a beautiful place, Go to McKinney Falls. You will not be disappointed.

Tiger Woods

My heart is breaking over this situation. By accident I turned the channel and saw that he was about to give an apology. I wanted to turn the channel because I thought that it was none of my business but curiosity and shock kept me watching. I have never been a golf fan thus never really been a Tiger Woods fan.

I kept watching thinking this is none of my business while feeling similar situational aspects of my own life coming to the forefront. I had a very horrible boyfriend who wanted his cake and eat it to. This is what Tiger was trying to do but the difference was that I really feel he never meant to hurt, disrespect or humiliate his family with this.

My ex during our relationship disrespected and humiliated me on a daily basis. He was most charismatic and if he were a car salesman, he could sell New Kia vehicles to a BMW car dealer. The one thing that I felt was very important when I was fed up with him and broke up with him, was that we treat each other with respect and try not to humiliate one another.

Unfortunately, it got worse. The humiliation and disrespect was in front of my face and I started writing a blog about it. This was very therapeutic for me but may not have been the best way of handling the situation. I do not regret it because I learned from it. I became stronger and found out that something from my recent past was not being dealt with psychologically. I started seeing a therapist and read self help books day and night.

I am not sure if Tiger's relationship will last but I am so glad that I watched. He spoke of his Buddhist upbringing and the core values that he felt made life better. He said that he went away from those core values and wants to come back to them. My core values were questioned as being Christian, even though I am Atheist, and they were also questioned as being the silly part of Americans. This made me feel better that there is a way of living that has nothing to do with the self. Living amongst others must take compassion, understanding, respect, honor, kindness, patience, faithfulness and self-control. Yes some of these come from the Bible but I believe the Bible to be a rule book for society rather than a religion. I don't agree with much in the bible but since we have a heightened awareness, it is important that we respect boundaries.

If we were wild animals, none of these rules would apply. We are not wild animals so why should we compare ourselves to them. I do like the study of animals because it does help us to understand things about ourselves but we know if we kill another that we have damaged not only that person but every person that knew that person as well as yourself. This goes with some of the "sins" listed in the bible. I believe in truth, I believe in honor, I believe in life, I believe in contracts and the respect that goes with them.

Tiger messed up but again that is totally between him and his wife. This is not something that we should be following. I wanted to watch his speech so that I can not have twisted words second hand. He seems much like my ex. Neither my ex nor Tiger are bad people but they did make some mistakes. I applaud Tiger for setting things right and pleading with the paparazzi to stop following his family. Even if they don't get back together, he showed great humility and allowed himself to stand on what he truly believes.

Life is so funny. It is true that what doesn't kill us can only make us stronger. I no longer look for people to abuse or use or take advantage of me. I try very hard not to turn it the other way and oppress another person. My old friendships worth saving have gotten so much deeper and my new friendships are with people who want nothing from me and are happy when things go well in my life and are there for me when they don't.

I know this is kind of word vomit but my mixed feelings over the Tiger Woods public apology are just as random. If every man could stand up and say that to their partner that they have wronged, we would have a much better society. Again, I don't think it is my business but this may have actually helped someone who is in the same situation.

I hope the best for your recover Tiger and the best for your wife's recovery.

Little gems

Lately things have been very stressful. I am realizing that the job search has gone a different route. I am fine with this but it does mean starting over again. This makes me a little anxious because I really want a house and a dog (my sweet Lacey can't be replaced but it would be nice to have a new little friend) and a yard, and new furniture and a TV and friends that live close by that come to my house and have dinner and enjoy just sitting and talking about something other than ourselves. I subscribe to a quote of the day site in my email and this little gem came in:

The greatest gift you will ever receive is the gift of loving and
believing in yourself. Guard this gift with your life. It is the only
thing that will ever truly be yours.

-- Tiffany Loren Rowe

I do love myself and believe in myself but the latter gets questioned by outside sources which makes one a bit guarded. I want to be in a place where I can let my guard down but until then I will just continue to love and believe in myself.

Even if I live on the street (which I will do my best to keep from happening) I know that I can adapt and find something loving and something secure. I really feel secure about so many things. Those things that I do not feel secure about, I have come to an acceptance of. They are mine just as my strengths are mine. I like being different and that will be what I have to offer... ME!

Sad day

I don't know why I am sad today.

I got an email from my great aunt and she said that she spoke to her brother and sister and they had some disappointing things to say. This made me think of my own two brothers and feel sad for the fact that we have hardly nothing in common. How can we come from the same parents and be so different? I moved away during some developmental years and I think that is why I am so estranged from them.

I think it is time to stop acting and start talking. This will be very difficult for me but I think the truth is so important. I am a very truthful person and will tell the truth when asked but my family and I have stopped asking questions so the truth remains within.

Today Real Utterances Tell Hope!!!!

Tomorrow Reveals Understanding Through Harmony!!!!

Take Refuge Until Talking Heals!!!!